IN BECOMING A WELL-ROUNDED WINTER ENTHUSIAST, one must learn to use a plethora of tools to master the never-ending pursuit of sliding on frozen water. A monoski is one such tool. The flock of monoskiers may be but a small part of the tribe, but we are growing once again. Read on, and join us if you dare.
1. Step one is the most important: If you want to be a monoskier, you have to look good. You are no longer a member of the general public; you are one of the few, the proud, the totally radical. Your outfit must be a one-piece, no goggles, and no toque. A headband is acceptable but only encouraged on cold days. You absolutely must have a mustache. Remember, the entire monoskiing clan is depending on how good you look.
2. You must be confident, even cocky. It doesn’t matter if you’ve never done it before. Exude confidence and poise. In the event of feeling insecure, remember, you only have one edge to worry about. And you look good (see rule 1).