Skier Buys Airbag, GoPro, Now Ready for the Backcountry.

Kansas City- After spending nearly $1,500 on a new Air Bag Equipped backpack and personal wearable camera, 27 year old Derryl Fisk has officially declared himself “ready for the fucking back country.”
Fisk, a bank teller, says that he has spent plenty of time researching his decision on internet forums, and is confident that his annual trip to Copper Mountain Colorado will be “the best one yet” thanks to his recent purchase. 
“Copper can be fun,” says Fisk. “But, this year I really want to ski some of the bigger lines that can only be found in the back country. I plan on spending only about half of my time in-bounds. I feel good knowing that if I’m caught in a slide, I’ll still be safe, and probably get a viral video.”
“It’s going to be great though, a group of 12 of us are going, and pretty much everyone but the girls are getting airbags. We’ll just send them down last, so they’ll be safe.”
Aiding Fisk’s purchase was three-month-veteran shop employee Austin DeLonge. DeLonge, admits that since joining the shop back in August, he’s quickly become the shop’s back country expert.
“I don’t know anybody who would go into the backcountry without an airbag-style pack,” states Delonge. “Just look at videos on the internet of people surviving slides. It seems like a new one comes out every few weeks. When I go into the backcountry this year, I’ll have an airbag.”
When asked about the purchase of other avalanche survival tools, such as a beacon, probe, or shovel though, Fisk admits he hadn’t yet purchased them.
“My shop doesn’t stock those items because they aren’t in very high demand,” admits Fisk. “And Austin said I should just buy them when I get to Colorado. It seems logical, and I bet I’ll get a killer deal.”
After completing his purchase, Fisk deployed his new airbag in the parking lot, exclaiming “Fuck you avalanche! Let’s go to Radio Shack now and get a drone for my GoPro”

**Piste Off is Bomb Snow’s new weekly satire column aimed at poking fun at the sports we all love. Bomb Snow’s “Piste Off” is a fictionalized, satirical publication. Its content should in no way be interpreted as an actual record of events. These stories are also not intended to be, nor should they be construed as, attempts to predict the future course of any individual or entity, but should be viewed only as parody. Piste Off is not associated with any other news service. Names used in “Piste Off” stories, unless those of public figures or entities, are fictional, and any resemblance to actual persons or entities is coincidental, unintentional, and accidental. Any event described in Bomb Snow’s “Piste Off” that actually comes to pass should also be considered coincidental, unintentional, and accidental.

Leave a Reply

Bombsnow on Instagram

Like us on Facebook